The Backson Song Lyrics – Craig Ferguson & Winnie the Pooh Cast

The Backson Song Text

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Owl: It's a Giant creature with a tail
Here I'll draw Piglet in for scale
His hide is like a shaggy rug
His face a surely ugly mug
With two sharp horns atop his head
In between a mop of hair that's red
And in his nose a ring of gold
It smells of monkey's feet and mold
Its toes are black
Its fur is blue
I swear that all I tell you is not made up
The Backson!
All: The Backson!
Owl: The Backson!
All: The Backson
Oh no!
Pooh: But Owl what does the Backson do?
All: Yes Owl what does the Backson do?
Owl: Hmm, what does the Backson do?
I'm thinking, I'm thinking, I'm thinking, I'm thinking and now I will tell you
They sneak into your library and scribble in all your books
All: The Backson, The Backson! We don't like the Backson!
Owl: When decorating your Christmas tree, they tangle up all the hooks!
All: The Backson! The Backson! We're afraid of the Backson.
Owl: They spoil the milk, they stop all the clocks, they use their horns to put hole in your socks
All: The Backson's the one who's been putting holes in our socks!

Roo: Tell us more about what Backsons do
Tigger: Yes more about what Backsons do
Owl: More about what Backsons do? Why don't we hear some thoughts from you
Tigger: Maybe they make ya sleep too late
Owl: Yes, yes that's good, that's great
Eeyore: I bet their the reason my tail is gone
Owl: You're on a roll go on, go on!
Rabbit: They muddy up your tiny house
Piglet: They make you feel as small as a mouse
Roo: They break your crayons
Rabbit: They spill your tea!
Kanga: They wake up babies at one and three
Eeyore: They made me catch the cold I caught
Winnie the Pooh: They made me lose my train of thought
Tigger: They swipe your strips
Piglet: They clog your pipes
Rabbit: They dig up your garden
Eeyore: They won't be your pardon
Winnie the Pooh: They eat your snacks
Piglet: They won't relax!
Rabbit: They chip your tooth
Kanga: They steal your youth!
Owl: And now you know the horrible truth
All: The Backson, The Backson, The Backson, The Backson. Oh Noooooo!


Rabbit: Oh yes
I know exactly what we'll do
We'll find things Backsons are partial to
Winnie the Pooh: Like books
Kanga: And dishes
Piglet: And socks
Roo: And toys
Rabbit: Yes everything that a Backson destroys
Then we'll dig an enormous pit and make the items lead to it
He'll fall in and we'll get our friend
Owl: And this horrible nightmare will come to an end
The Backson!
All: The Backson!
Owl: The Backson!
All: The Backson!
Owl: Go home and search your closets, bring everything that you can
All: The Backson! The Backson! We're gonna catch the Backson!
Owl: We'll save Christopher Robin by following Rabbit's plan
All: The Backson! The Backson! We'll save Christopher Robin!
We must be brave and have no fear
Owl: Search to the death, we'll persevere
All: We'll search by the sun and the light and the moon and everything goes well!
We'll be back soon!
Owl: Back soon?
All: Back soon!
Owl: Sounds like Backson
All: Back soon!
Owl: Oh well, good luck everyone!

[Thanks to Lenny P for lyrics]