CORNET MAN Lyrics

CORNET MAN Text

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Fanny convinces Eddie she has talent and he agrees to teach her the specialty
for the next audition. She gets the job.

FANNY:
Well--
I just put the kids to sleep
And swept the shack,
Took my sweet man's satchel down
And watched him pack,
I said, "Darlin', while the stove still smolders,
Unpin your woman's hair and rub her shoulders."
I threw myself across the doorway
Beggin', "Stay, sweet man, stay,"
But there's more in my man's life
Than this old hag.
It's Jelly Roll Morton, and a shiny cornet,
And jazzin' the rag!
The lady ain't been born
Can take the place of a horn,
With a cornet man.
A-goin' where there's blowin',
Trav'lin' cornet man.
Just anytime they call him
He'll leave his wife and kiddies
Sittin' with their tongues out
To play for peanuts in a dive
And blow his lungs out.
He'll hop a choo-choo on a moment's notice
To play some dates with Billy Bates
Or Rag-time Otis!
The lady ain't see light
Can give a horn a fair fight
With a cornet man
A rootin', shootin', ever-tootin' Dapper Dan
Who carries in his satchel
A powder-blue Norfolk suit,
A silver-plated wah-wah mute,
There is whiskey, gamblin'--each one is a curse,
But I'm up against a devil that's worse.
Yes, a horn is my thorn,
My trav'lin' cornet man!

Kill yourself! Tell me about it! Yeah! Yeah!

A powder-blue Norfolk suit,
I said a silver-plated wah-wah mute,
Oh he's shy on height,
He's short on weight,
But he's the only man can make my coffee perculate,
A Dapper Dan,
My cornet-playin' man.

After the performance, Nick Arnstein comes backstage, elegant in formal dress,
to pay off a gambling debt to Keeney. Nick has seen the show and tells Fanny
she's going to be a big star some day. Fanny asks how much Keeney is paying her,
and Nick manages to jack up her salary by pretending to bid on behalf of a competitor.
He gives her his card and kisses her hand. Eddie asks Fanny out for a date,
but she only wants to be friends; already she has fallen for Nick, but imagines she'll
never see him again.